Below is a picture of the lion king and his wifey.
(as I get better with this, I'll start posting more pictures) Men can learn many lessons from the lion. For one, the lion chills all day, spending about 20 hrs of every day just being fabulous. Notice him above, surveying his kingdom. He doesn't give a fuck. He is respected and feared -- thoroughly in control, regulating. Further, when he bangs, he goes 20-40 times per session. Niiice.
"But how does he eat, Aaron?" I'm glad you asked. While the lion sleeps late and chills on his perch, smoking doobies, the lionwifey (lifey, for short) is out hunting for food. She relentlessly stalks, then kills her prey. But does she eat? No no. Lions teach their women respect. Lifey first brings back the meat so that her man can eat first. Only then does she eat and give to the kiddies.
So next time you see a lion, know this: not only is he a 400+ lb killing machine who chills out listening to Marley all day while his wifey brings him food. He is also the gangsta-ist animal in the world.
2 comments:
lifey knows what's up and i'll tell you why: she's really wearing the lion pants in the relationship. if she doesn't feel like hunting and wants to lay around just being fabulous, listening to regina spektor and smoking doobies, gangsta doesn't eat. he needs her and they both know it.
all my love,
lifey.
Great work.
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